Oh, this was a fun one and wonderfully sentimental and quirky!Rachael and Chris both were raised Christian, but found that their beliefs changed as they became adults. Rachael became Wiccan and Chris leaned in that direction as well, though he would probably decribe himself as humanist. Their parents, though loving and supportive, were not completely on board with their respective children's spiritual outlook. It happens. And so, they wanted a unique ceremony that captured their beliefs without distancing their families. It was also July, hot, and outdoors so we wanted something simple and on the shorter side. And so the scene was set. The ceremony was in-the-round, one of my favorite ceremony settings. The chairs are placed in a circle surrounding the couple, bringing more intimacy, more warmth and interaction, and, in this case, eliminating the need to use a microphone. There was a trombone solo to lead the bride in, and Irish bagpipes to lead our couple out. This ceremony features a handfasting, used here as a simple unity ceremony. However, instead of simply binding the two of them together with a cord, we passed the cords around so that all of the guests could take a moment, hold the cords and place whatever best wishes, blessings, or prayers that they had for the couple upon them. It truly made everyone involved feel as if they were an integral part of not only the ceremony, but also Rachael and Chris's lives.
The Wedding of Rachael Shade & Christopher Neff
July 20th, 2013
Opening:
Family and friends, welcome to this celebration for Rachael and Chris.
With the horizon our only walls, the sky our only ceiling and the earth our floor, we meet here in nature to affirm their love. The fragrant blooms from the ground and the fiery heat from the sky attest to summer's warmth and abundance, and also the warmth and abundance of Rachael and Chris's desire for commitment. They want to welcome you to this celebration of their love for one another. Each of you has given something special to their lives. Your love and encouragement will forever be appreciated. Thank you for sharing one of life's happiest moments with them. May you be as important a part of their tomorrow as you are of their today.
Honoring the Deceased:
Rachael and Chris would like to take a moment of silence to remember loved ones who share this day with us in spirit and memory. Let us dwell quietly for a moment on the enduring energy of their love. (silence)
Blessing of the Cord
Rachael and Chris have chosen a traditional Handfasting Ceremony.
The tradition is as old as the written language and is practiced in many cultures.
In Europe, until the mid 1700’s few unions were sanctified in a church or a synagogue.
Rather they were celebrated by a ceremony in which the couple joined hands over the village anvil, out in the fields or in a grove of trees.
The hands were then bound together with ribbon or rope.
This is where the terms ‘giving one’s hand in marriage’ and ‘tying the knot’ come from.
Today we will build on this tradition.
As this cord symbolizes the couple's joining, their bond also includes you in their lives. As family and friends, they ask that you place your blessings, energies, and positive thoughts on it. If you wish, please place your good intentions onto the cord.
Reading
What is Real?, from the Velveteen Rabbit, by Margery Williams
Reader: Christina, Chris’s mom
"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"
"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but really loves you, then you become Real."
"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.
"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."
"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"
"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get all loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."
"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but really loves you, then you become Real."
"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.
"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."
"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"
"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get all loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."
"I suppose you are real?" said the Rabbit. And he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive.
But the Skin Horse only smiled.
"Someone made me Real," he said. "That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always."
But the Skin Horse only smiled.
"Someone made me Real," he said. "That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always."
Mark’s Message
Omitted for this post
Reading
Looking for Your Face, by Rumi
Reader: John Shade, Rachael’s godfather
From the beginning of my life I have been looking for your face, but today I have seen it. Today I have seen the charm, the beauty, the unfathomable grace of the face that I was looking for. Today I have found you, and those who laughed and scorned me yesterday are sorry that they were not looking as I did. I am bewildered by the magnificence of your beauty, and wish to see you with a hundred eyes. My heart has burned with passion and has searched forever for this wondrous beauty that I now behold. I am ashamed to call this love human, and afraid of God to call it divine. Your fragrant breath, like the morning breeze, has come to the stillness of the garden. You have breathed new life into me. I have become your sunshine, and also your shadow. My soul is screaming in ecstasy. Every fiber of my being is in love with you. Your effulgence has lit a fire in my heart, and you have made radiant for me the earth and sky. My arrow of love has arrived at the target. I am in the house of mercy, and my heart is a place of prayer.
Vows:
Chris: Our love is like our garden, and we are the caretakers.
Over time, we have made it grow, made it blossom.
It has taught us the patience to know that things can’t be rushed.
It has made us more connected and showed us that, together, we can tackle anything.
Rachael, today we plant a tree in this garden. It is the tree of our life together.
It will need nourishment and love. The more we care for it, the bigger it will grow.
It will give us our food. It will shelter us under its branches.
It will provide for others in need who seek it.
Storms may batter it, but it will remain standing.
And it will still be there long after we are gone, as a monument of our devotion.
Rachael: Because of you, I laugh, I smile, I dare to dream again.
I look forward with great joy to spending the rest of my
life with you, nurturing you, being there for you in all life
has for us, and I vow to be true to you for as long
as we share our paths together.
Ring Exchange:
Your rings are circles and a circle is the symbol of the sun, the earth, the universe, of wholeness, perfection, peace and unity. Like circles, your rings have no beginning and no end and in the sacred tradition of marriage rings have come to symbolize eternal love and the endless union of
body, of mind, and spirit. These rings will be worn by Rachael and Chris to show to the world their love and commitment to one another. May the presence of these rings always remind you of the devotion you willingly share with one another from this moment on.
Let each of us in his own way, may it be prayer, may it be by a thought, whatever you and I would
wish for this couple, let's pray or have our own thoughts as a blessing upon these rings. Let us
pause at this time for these silent blessings.
(Pause)
These rings, now blessed are a symbol of love and faithfulness. They seal the vows of marriage and represent a promise of forever love.
(Chris places ring on Rachael's finger silently, kisses her hand. Rachael does the same to Chris).
Hand fasting:
As this knot is tied, so are your lives now bound.
Woven into this cord, into its very fibers, are all the hopes of your friends and family, and of yourselves, for your new life together. With the entwining of this knot do I tie all the desires, dreams, love, and happiness wished here in this place to your lives for as long as love shall last.
In the joining of hands and the fashion of a knot, so are your lives now bound, one to
another. By this cord you are thus bound to your vow.
May this knot remain tied for as long as love shall last.
Closing:
May your days together shine brightly. May your communication continue to deepen. May your lives together be filled with love, abundance and joy. Friends and family, may I now introduce Mr.
and Mrs. Chris and Rachael Neffshade!
Kiss
Par-tay
